Based on a Naaleh.com shiur by Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller
The verse in Tehilim states, “Kol kevuda bat melech pnima.” The honor of the king’s daughter is within. One of the names of the soul is kavod. A woman’s kavod, her true essence, is her home.
The Gemara says, “Nothing is missing in the king’s house.” When a woman has a deep need, the possibility of receiving what she is lacking is there, by turning towards her husband and touching his desire to give. This will bring down bounty from Hashem.
In Tehilim it says, “Shimi bat u’ri v’hati ozneich.” Listen daughter and see, incline your ears. The Alshich explains that a woman’s soul stands before Hashem in heaven and He shows her the light and happiness that could be hers when she finds her mate. Hashem then tells her two things. She must look at her husband and regard him as a king, and incline her ear and listen to what he says. Her goal should be to fulfill his will and desires. She must forget the expectations she developed from observing her parental home. She’s living a new chapter in her life. What she must receive from her husband is different than what her mother had to receive from her father.
Secure children are nurtured in a home where both parents turn towards Hashem and towards each other. A woman feels inner tranquility when she knows her husband cares about her needs. A husband feels at peace when he sees that what he gives is desired and appreciated and is used to build.
This kind of relationship is impossible unless the woman has emunah (faith) in Hashem. The Shechina is ultimately who she turns to. A husband is who he is. If she realizes he is giving what he can, and that she has to ask Hashem to give him more to give her, then everything is different. She doesn’t have to struggle. She should give her husband permission to do that. Her job is to be vulnerable and to ask and this will bring down blessing.
The key element that makes us Jews is our faithfulness to Hashem, our turning only towards Him and not to other forces. We are called bnei brit, the children of the covenant. There is no end to our trust in our ability to receive from Hashem and this power to be faithful comes through the woman.